Within the last two months my life has changed in ways that I thought weren't ever going to happen, but you know what, its for the better. I am growing more and more each day. Yes I the occasional day where I struggle and just wish that I could forget about everything, but you know what, the past is the past and it's what has made me who I am today. I have recently been looking at going to an out of state college. To get away from Oregon and Mac in general. My problem with that lies in three things, the first being the cost. Arizona and Penn State are out of the question because I can not in any way afford the out of state tuition it would cost me to go. Though I have been looking at going to Houston University. Hmm me in Texas, I never thought I would see myself there, but now is the time for me to live. The next thing keeping me here is my family. My mom is not rather fond of the idea of me moving out of state for several reasons that are still unclear to me. But she said that even though she does not like the idea of me leaving, she would support it. The last thing keeping me here momentarily is the fact that I have met someone new. He's so sweet and so amazing! He is a year in a half older then me and he works full time. We have been talking recently and he told me that he wanted me to be his, he only wanted to ask me in person first. And you know what, I want to be his. He makes me feel so good about myself! He is so kind and funny :) he just leaves me with this giant grin on my face and I can not wipe it from my face! I just can't wait to meet up with him and kiss his adorable lips!
Ashley's wedding is coming up soon and I have like a million in one things to do to get ready for it. I have the party and the planning to get done. I still have to get shoes for my dress, find a hairstyle, get the right jewelry, pick out the flowers for my bouquet, make sure we have the decorations, and so much more! I am so happy for my best friend, she definitely made a good choice! My god son is growing up rather quickly. He is almost nine months old! Yikes my baby boy has grown up so fast! When I look at him, I wonder what my life would be like if I had one of my own, but since my scare not that long ago, I know I am not ready in certain ways. I just got my freedom back and I am not yet ready to give it up. But I don't mind taking care of my god son, he is the only man right now in my heart. And he will always hold a place there, he is my first god son! Already he knows me and loves to cuddle with me. I am so glad that Ash isn't moving, I wasn't ready to lose my best friend once again.
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