i'm tired

things have been rough, i will admit that. but i wish that they would go back to the way they had used to be. where i didn't have a worry at all, where i could be strong. but it seems like i've been dwindling down some. i don't know what my problem. i'm just glad that sam is here to help me along the way. i think that with out him, i would be someplace dark. things really need to lighten up more. i am tired of all the dark, tired of how the weather makes me feel down all the time, how i feel so emotional, insecure about things, feeling like nothing i do seems right, how i feel left out and in the backseat at times. i just want the sun to shine and things to go back to normal. the feeling of happiness and love.

i'm sorry i just needed to rant really babdly about things...and this seemed like the only way that i could do it

About him

like it always seems, i don't post for the longest time, and things happen. I can be proud to say that in less than a week i will be celebrating my seven month anniversary with the most amazing guy in the world. And i know it seems like in every post i say that, but what can i say. I became truly blessed when he came into my life. He is the sun that burns with in me on those cold days in winter. Yes we do have our occasional bumps in the road, but seriously, most couple do. We have really only had one big one, and it has only made us stronger because of it. I know that at times we seem frustrated or angry at one another, but we love each other so much. that is what matters. In about about 9 days, i get to take him to formal, I am so happy about that. its going to be a night to remember for us ^^ to dance into the night and just stare into his handsome eyes. When ever i look into them, they make me melt. the way that they look at me, love warmth, but also lust at times. he does know how to make a girl melt into a puddle.

I love you baby boy